a grumble rather than a rant

Posted: November 17, 2010 in Uncategorized

for Big Tent Poetry 19.11.10  The prompt is to write a cascade poem, where the three lines of the opening stanza are repeated in order as the last lines of the following three stanzas.  The PAD challenge for 17.11  asks us to write a poem based on “Tell me Why…”  The two fit well together.

Today is my husband’s 77tth birthday.  It is also the day that he had a blood test, fasting, at 10.00 am.  So far, the birthday is not going well, as you will see from my cascade poem. 
I gave him his beautifully wrapped lambswool pullover, first thing.  His response “I’ve got one almost the same colour.”  Then silence.  He hasn’t, he has a wardrobe full of tatty rags which he refuses to discard.  He has a cotton sweatshirt that colour, but nothing warm.  By the time we were sitting in the nurse’s waiting room he was snarling at me while buttering up in execrable French the assorted patients as they arrived.  During the short ride home there was a thick black cloud hovering around him.  Then:  breakfast, and the sun came out.

Cascade of sighs

Tell me, why are men bad-tempered
when they’re hungry?
Women fall over themselves to feed them.

No wonder we women are stove slaves
in the cause of peace in the home.
Why are men bad-tempered?

Snap, snarl, spit
goes my man
when he’s hungry

and that is why
it’s in my interest
to fall over myself to feed him.

PS He’s now had breakfast AND lunch, but is still grumpy, so it must be his discontent at being 77.  Still, it’s better than the alternative.

  1. wayne says:

    nice one Viv…..and a very happy BD to your hubby. Grumpy when hungry?….he should smile be happy and enjoy……..and be thankful….and Im sure he is…..

  2. hedgewitch says:

    I also have a husband with clothes in rags who will only wear the new things I buy him after they’ve set in the closet for at least a year. His form of grumpiness is usually just silence, though, so it’s easier to deal with. Nice one.

  3. nan says:

    I loved this one! It flowed, I could relate, and I laughed! Even with the hard-to-take grumpiness, you have empathy and you understand it is about more than being hungry and cranky. Sure does beat the alternative!

  4. Tumblewords says:

    Wow – there’s a ton of honesty in this charming cascade spill. Love it. I dislike cooking more than being single. 🙂

  5. Linda Jacobs says:

    The repetition works really well, here; your exasperation is obvious. I can absolutely relate!

  6. 1sojournal says:

    Viv, enjoyed this the first time I read it. Even more this time. You nailed it and the cascade. Fun poeming,


  7. amanda says:

    very cute Vivienne I have to agree with you totally on this one!

  8. You did a fine job with this, and BOY do I feel for you…been there many times myself!

  9. Linda says:

    I found myself laughing as I read this poem. Get that man a cookbook!

  10. A brief glimpse into your daily life. I laughed at you candor. My wife Luscious says that when I’m hungry and not fed right away I quite possibly might kill the neighbors cat and eat it. Since I do 90% of the cooking in our household she would get to enjoy the same kitty delicacy. It’s the cave man DNA in human males. Thanks Viv.

  11. pamela says:

    I enjoyed this cascade. Seems men are just like that.
    My husband is the same. And I do all the cooking in my house,
    he will have it no other way. He tells me he can’t cook,
    doesn’t know the first thing about cooking, etc …
    glad the sun came out!

    • vivinfrance says:

      Unfortunately, it quickly went back in again and he’s still as grouchy as a bear with a sore paw. That’s why I keep escaping to my workroom and writing nonsense stuff.

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